I have trouble sleeping lately. And as always when I’m lying in bed and it’s dark and quiet, my mind begins to wander like at no other time during the day. With all the worries of how Ali and I will be able to live together permanently in the future I naturally spend a lot of time researching on governmental websites, trying to understand criteria, conditions and laws. So while lying in the pitch black a thought passed through my mind: “I really wish there was any organisation of people who has already gone through this whole process and who are willing to share their knowledge and guide others through the same situation they have been in.” I thought once Ali and me are through with this I should definitely start something like that – although I would most probably just want to forget about the hassle that is annoying me out of mind already before it has even really started.
And well, because I could not sleep, anyway, I grabbed my mobile lying on my bedside locker and searched Google for an organisation like that. I don’t know why exactly it surprised me that I actually found one. A German one. An organisation with an office in my hometown. And free advisory service. What?
I guess it surprised me because I had never heard of “Verband internationaler Familien und Partnerschaften” (Association of International Families and Partnerships) during all the years in this binational long-distance relationship when I have been reading associated blogs and forums all this time (eff you Google rankings!). The association does not only help (married) couples to make it to live together but also argues against racial discrimination and racism, and for cultural diversity, integration and many other topics that concern couples from two different countries and/or cultures:
“This association represents the interests of binational families and partnerships throughout Germany. We support the social and legal equality of people regardless of their skin color or their cultural origin. We work as a non-profit organization in more than 20 cities in and outside of Germany. Counseling women and men regarding all issues of binational marriages and relationships is one focus of our work. We use legal restrictions and the various forms of disadvantage and discrimination as an opportunity to inform the public and to provide a basis for dialogue between the organization and the federal government. One of our most important tasks is to highlight the chances and possibilities that arise when people of different cultures live together.“
(Verband binationaler Familien und Partnerschaften)
This is what I really appreaciate about Germany: there are clubs and organisation for whatsoever “silly” purpose you can think of. And while may only a minority of the population can actually identify with the goals of each single one, the minorities are exactly the ones who need someone to speak up for them.
Although our primary goal is for Ali to take German class in Germany first, whenever it comes to marrying it is good to know that there are people you can turn to for help and that obviously you are not as alone as you think you are. And after all, marrying and all the paperwork that comes with it might not be as far away as I like to think…Hail bureaucracy!